Tuesday 20 May 2014

My Simple Philosophy for Raising Children

As a former teacher, I have seen children who are very successful(all rounded, good at everything, very confident person and happy) and children who lack even the basic instinct to even try to succeed or to be good at anything. So what is it that is different from the 2 groups of children? In trying to explore and find the recipe for success, it started me thinking how to raise my children so that they will belong to the first group. Of course, even if the parents try to help their children, there is no guarantee there will turn out the way we want them to. But the important thing is that we try. As parents, we should not dictate what our children will become but we try to equip and develop them with the skills they will need to succeed in what they choose to do.  

Having a philosophy of raising children is very important because it gives you an ultimate goal to work towards and gives you direction on how to work towards that goal. So, it is important to get it clear from the start what you want your child to be like and how to achieve it. This is how we can raise successful children.

My Simple Philosophy:
I want to prepare my children to be ready for the real world and be a successful person. 


What skills do they need in the real world? 

Skill
What it means
Why it is important
Self identity
Strengths of the child.
Weaknesses of the child.
The child needs to learn to use his strengths to his advantage and try to stretch in the areas.

At the same time, the child needs to learn his weaknesses, so that he can either improve on it, or find another way to get around it.

I always tell my students and children: “Not everyone is good at everything. You just need to find what you are good and do it well enough for people to recognise and value that”.

After all, you don’t need your doctors to know how cook or build a building right?
Interpersonal skill
It is the social skills of mixing well with others, ability to communicate well and being sympathetic.

This is the main reason why I send my children to school. In the real world, the children need to learn to negotiate or charm their way through. They need to learn to work in a social environment where they earn their acceptance, learn to be a leader and learn to communicate effectively with others.

Well, you will definitely agree with this “whether your boss like you, is more important than the work you do”. It helps if you are a likable character with more friends to help you.
Intrapersonal skill
The ability to plan ahead, set goals and reflect on past experience.

This is one of the important ingredients of a success person. Being goal orientated, having the ability of forward planning and learning from past experience would give the person the drive/motivation/the direction to achieve what he wants.
Self Esteem
Self Worth
Confidence
Sense of purpose
For people to respect you, you first have to respect yourself.”

People with low esteem face a lot of emotional issues and behavioural issues.
Values

A sense of Responsibility
Courage
Honesty
Self Control
Respect
Character building is important because without the right values, the child will not be able to succeed eventually because our society still despises people who lack values.
Attitude

Persistent
Humble
Positive
Self reliance
Attitude in life is something that develops from young and is very difficult to change once it is set. So start it right.
Discipline
Behaviour
Routines
Discipline in behaviour can be learnt slowly but surely. In fact, parents’ attitude towards discipline will shape the child’s attitude.
For example: “A boy bites another child and his mother simply does not discipline him, then the child will learn that it’s no big deal to misbehave because there are no consequences”.

Therefore, we discipline the child because we want the child to learn that “every action has its consequences”.

There are no bad or good decisions. Only decisions with different consequences.”

Routines are important because “practice makes perfect”. If you want your child to be good at mathematics, of course, he will need to be discipline enough to practice everyday.

Once you set up this habit of self discipline of doing things, it will be easier for the child to learn anything in the future.

Other skills
Problem solving
Critical thinking
Logical thinking
Creativity
Curiosity
Listening skills
Memory
Physical activities
Public speaking
These are skills that society still values.
Academic
Reading
Writing
Mathematical
Vocabulary
scientific
You don’t need me to tell you why these are important.



How can I help my children to achieve all these skills?

Through a different range of activities to encourage and develop the different skills to help my children succeed. As many of my friends who are also mothers have asked me to share with them, I have set up this blog is to share some of the activities that I have done with my own children.

By the way, I am new to blogging and will take some time to learn the how to post effectively and thank you for your patience. 



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